I was interrupted from watching a "Baby Einstein" video with my daughter this past Saturday by a call from none other than the Red Man. We never talk on the weekends so I figured this had to be important. He asked me a question that, at the time, I didn't think much of, but in retrospect, it could change the course of our long-standing friendship.
"Would you mind if I left Sprint?"
This might seem to be a harmless question, but it isn't. The foundation of our cross-continental friendship has been free phone calls to one another on a weekly basis because we both have Sprint for our cellular phone carrier. Although I had made several threats that I was going to Verizon once my contract expired in December, it was the Red Man who was about to draw first blood.
"No, why would I care?"
The Red Man, technology-nerd that he is, went the AT&T route, selling his soul to buy an iPhone. By doing so, he has left the Doctor and his Sprint phone in the dust, pondering just how many anytime minutes he has left to keep his friendship alive.
We could have remained as cool as the Sprint pitchman on the left, but Red had to change it up, and now the Doctor is wondering if the weekly phone calls can continue. We're talking another 30-45 of my "anytime" minutes here! What used to be free phone calls now will have the sound of a meter running.
The future of our phone conversations looks bleak...no more calls dissecting the Red Sox's chances of winning the World Series. No more political debates. No more long-winded discussions of the lying, cheating Bill Belichick. Our calls will soon evolve into a simple exchange of pleasantries and the polite, "How's the weather" question. And for what? The Red Man has put his friendship on the line over a damn iPhone! Burn in hell, Steve Jobs. I'm glad Bill Gates stole your ideas.
On second thought...is it wrong to blame Apple for this apocalypse? The jury is out, check back in a couple of months when the phone calls have dried up, or the Doctor has shelled out every last nickel to his name because he went over his allotted anytime minutes.
A couple of quick notes that have recently come to the good Doctor's attention that are worth mentioning.
Facebook is awesome, much better and more addicting than MySpace. You may recall a
blog I wrote about Caterina (Cathy) Mete, a "Wiggles" dancer the Doc had the hots for. Well she's on Facebook and this picture was downloaded by the Doc to show you just how smoking she is out of her red jacket and black pants. The doctor did send her a love note, inviting her to L.A. without her fellow dancers, but so far, no response. Although we are expecting something from her attorney in the mail though. Something that had the words "cease" and "desist" and "500 feet" in it. Not sure what that's all about. Regardles....
Hubba hubba as one fellow blogger might say.
Not sure if anyone watched the Emmy's or not (this past show was the lowest rated one in the show's history, so probably nobody who reads this blog tuned in) but I saw two good reasons to watch the AMC show, "Mad Men."
The charming woman on the right is Christina Hendricks (no relation to Ted as far as I know). She takes the word "buxom" to a whole 'nother level. And those guns look real folks. She's 30, and apparently still single. So the Doc is hoping for a nice get together with Miss. Mete and Miss Hendricks someday. Clothing, prophylactics, and morals will be optional.
And then he might not care about the fucking iPhone.
Yeah, Julianne Hough is really hot. But she's leaving "Dancing With The Stars" giving heterosexual men no reason whatsoever to watch that show. She did it to pursue other careers, like acting. If only it were "acting" in a Skinemax movie...
, but porn star Lisa Ann will be.
This might be the only time where I was interested in what a politican looked like naked before I cast my ballot.
We could have remained as cool as the Sprint pitchman on the left, but Red had to change it up, and now the Doctor is wondering if the weekly phone calls can continue. We're talking another 30-45 of my "anytime" minutes here! What used to be free phone calls now will have the sound of a meter running.
Hubba hubba as one fellow blogger might say.
Z is on the left wearing the leather jacket and long sideburns.
The Most Dangerous Game (1999 DVD)
A rarely-seen still in which R-Lo comforts Fay Wray and hopes his wife doesn't find out about it! 
A Cottage on Dartmoor (2007 DVD)
Hershey said she would like her breasts to be even bigger, but the state of Texas limits the amount of silicone that can be put into each breast. And so it seems that eight surgeries won't be enough for her.
The Hands of Orlac (2008 DVD)
Jewish comic Garry Shandling is a ground-breaker, first as a writer, then as a stand-up comic, a host, and then creator of two hilarious shows. He's kind of like a Jewish Gallagher in a sense that he too helped make the cable company Showtime worth buying in the 80's.
But all of this excellence nearly ground to a halt when Leo's little brother Ron toured the country as "Gallagher Too." Originally granted a blessing by big brother Leo to perform using the "Gallagher" moniker, Ron began to blur the line that existed between his act and his brother's, eventually infringing on the empire o
f comedy his brother worked so hard to build.
David Letterman, Robin Williams, Jim Carrey, Tom Hanks and Michael Keaton. Gallagher expressed frustration over Hanks and Keaton’s success, remarking that they were millionaires and someone with his skills and ability was reduced to renting a condo. While criticising Jay Leno and Letterman, he expressed surprise that they never invited him to appear in their shows, citing that Johnny Carson never liked him, but still booked him."
That's right! Red Man's idol, one David Cross, was in the "Alvin and the Chipmunks" movie which also starred my name is Jason Lee. I guess the "Mr. Show" residual checks were lost in the mail and Cross needed a few bucks.
In the Valley of Elah (2008 DVD)
ost graduated from the same high school that Barbra Streisand and Eli Wallach did. Red Man graduated from the same high school that Sam Wolf and "His Buddy Dave From Long Island" graduated from.
1. Double Trouble - 1984 series that lasted 16 episodes about twin sisters. These cuties were straight out of a Doublemint gum commercial, and right into R-Lo's wheelhouse (oddly enough they were little too old for Z). The Doctor's take on this one -- great show that would have gotten him through puberty had it lasted just a few more episodes.
4. Facts of Life - Technically started in 1979, most will remember this important series as an 80's show. While it launched Clooney's career towards the end (you doubt my veracity?), the Doctor best remembers it for his second love -- Nancy McKeon as Jo.
